Grace Through Faith
(Sermon on the Mount)
Forgiveness and Reconciliation
“Not Forgiveness or Reconciliation”
By Anthony Baatz
One of the many issues we are often confronted with during holidays is the issue of forgiveness and reconciliation. For those who have offended someone we love, it’s a time to reflect on our attitudes, and to perhaps seek a path toward mending broken relalationships. Or if you have been on the receiving end of someone’s offense, perhaps it’s time to consider the need to mend your fences and open the door to the offending party? One thing is certain, Christmas is filled with far more cheer than most any other season. So prayerfully consider your options in light of the love God has shown each of us in giving His only begotten Son to pay the penalty for all of our sins. After all, the main themes of Christmas are faith, love, mercy, peace, and grace.
Have you ever read an article or book about forgiveness and reconciliation, or some other topic written from a biblical perspective, but it just didn’t seem to clearly match up with what you understand from scripture? Before I get in to the specifics of forgiveness and reconciliation, it is important for you to assess your perspective regarding the value of scripture, what you believe regarding scripture, how you can be certain that scripture is what you are basing your understanding of forgiveness and reconciliation on and not merely someone’s opinion. Scripture should be central in forming our beliefs, in driving our attitudes, and used as the only resource to know how we should act toward one another.
As believers and followers of Christ, His is the last Word in defining reality in the context of our experience as His disciples. My understanding is informed through Biblical Authority - The Bible is the final authority in all matters of belief and practice because the Bible is inspired by God and bears the absolute authority of God Himself. No human opinion or decree of any church or group can override the Bible.
Philippians 2:12–13 (NKJV): “Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; 13 for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.”
Wiersbe’s Commentary explains: “Paul admonishes us as saints to work to the full completion of our faith. The verb “work out” carries the meaning such as working out a problem in mathematics. In Paul’s day it was also used for “working a mine,” that is, getting out of the mine all the valuable ore possible.”
The model in scripture affirms that true ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ are inseparable because they are not merely a spoken word between two people. It is your response to the truth of God’s Word that leads to an action of the heart, an action which reflects that the condition of your heart is in unity with scripture, the will of God, and the unconditional love of God toward the person you believe has offended you — to pardon completely and then to forget that the offense ever took place, as this is how God has acted toward you. Then and only then have you truly forgiven and your heart is in the proper posture for reconciliation, which is the supernatural response to restore that person in fellowship with you. Forgiveness without reconciliation is not biblical, as you will see later in this article.
Maybe someone has offended you in some significant way. That leaves an unanswered question as to what you define as significant, and how that relates to your present circumstance. It is often our natural tendency to want to walk away from relationships when someone has wounded our heart or offended us. However, we should consider if the offense is so significant that it warrants our contempt. Is this person unwilling to reconcile with us? Are we being just in our assessment of the circumstance? Are you seeking God’s approval or the permission of others in your response to this person? Certainly, as disciples of Christ we are commanded to love one another and to be Christlike in our relationships. Would you classify your response as walking in the Spirit or the flesh?
It is important to ask yourself if this person understands the offense from your perspective. How does this person feel about you and why? Have you unknowingly offended or hurt them? One final, but very important question, is the hurt you are experiencing related to this incident alone, or are you also experiencing the sting of past experiences? This is an important question because past offenses that have gone unresolved can intrude into present circumstances, causing us confusion and spiritual blindness, and to overreact in the present circumstance. Some hurts are with us so long that they become part of our identity, a part that hinders our walk with God and spiritual intimacy with His indwelling Holy Spirit. Our true identity is in Christ! He wants to help us to learn to walk in freedom by exposing these hurts in His loving presence and to provide us with healing and restoration.
When something or someone in our present circumstance triggers memories of hurts from our past, we do not always see these circumstances from God’s perspective. Instead we become reactionary and emotionally reconnected to the pain of these past experiences. It is the goal of the Enemy to rob us, to hinder God’s work to form us into the image of Christ. The Enemy and our flesh, our old sin nature, both have the capacity to sabotage God’s plan to move us forward in this process of transformation. In essence, this is a form of PTSD, what I call, Post Traumatic Spiritual Disorientation. We become partly disconnected from God because the pain and emotions draws us away from God, back toward the past to a time of weakness, spiritual or emotional immaturity, or unresolved baggage. Suffering tests our faith, but it cannot diminish God or His ability to renew and grow our faith. He is always with us in the midst of our suffering (John 14:16-17).
If you have recently come to salvation through Christ or if you have not matured spiritually because you have not been properly discipled or mentored, you may lack in spiritual discernment. That discernment and spiritual maturity comes through exercising spiritual disciplines. These disciplines are obtained through worship, prayer, hearing the preaching of the Word of God, bible study, and small group participation. In my own experience I have missed opportunities that God intended to use to free me from past hurts and provide healing, because I allowed the fear of, and or the pain from those experiences to drive me in the opposite direction, and because of spiritual immaturity. Spiritual and emotional immaturity is a significant hinderance to consider. Paul teaches that faith is a product of learning from the Word of God. Romans 10:17 (NKJV): “So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.”
God is patient with us! As I studied His Word growing in faith, and was mentored and matured spiritually, looking back, I can see how He used those missed opportunities to become future sign posts, to reveal that these missed opportunities represented His previous attempts to provide healing and reconciliation. As I exercised spiritual disciplines I was then able to recognize His activity to transform my thinking to conform to the mind of Christ. From that perspective it propelled me forward because it affirmed His love for me and my faith and trust in Him. I was then able to see those experiences from God’s perspective because He used this process of maturity to heal my heart, removing all of the residual emotional pain and spiritual scars those experiences had caused. This too represents a component of God’s lifelong process of healing and reconciling us to Himself, whether that painful experience resulted from someone else’s sin or our own. For that healing to take place, we must be willing by faith to step into His light, to risk leaving the comforts of the walls of protection we have built, to allow His light to shine into the darkness of the pain we have hidden in our heart.
There is nothing that compares with the healing and liberty which comes from God revealing His love in this way. It not only liberates us from the past, but provides His presence and peace which surpasses our understanding. As we continue growing spiritually, it becomes a testimony of His work in us that He will use these victories to give us opportunities to bring His healing and peace to others. Nothing is wasted in God’s economy, He will use everything in our lives to show us His unfathomable love, and to reveal Himself to others through us. The only thing that hinders us is our fear, unwillingness, or disobedience. Paul emphasizes the way God accomplishes this dual blessing in 2 Corinthians 1:3–4 (NKJV): “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” I say these things because of the deep, deep, love of Christ that dwells in me, because of the great love God has for us, and the boundless joy and peace I possess through His indwelling Holy Spirit.
For that kind of deep healing to take place, we must be willing by faith to step into His light, to risk leaving the comforts of the walls of protection we have built, to allow His light to shine into the darkness of the pain we have hidden in our heart. For me this resulted is His glorious truth bursting forth, like the trumpet sounding that collapsed the walls of Jericho (Joshua 6:20), allowing His light to dispel that very darkness and soothe my soul with His love and peace. This changed my perspective about reconciliation, to recognize that forgiveness and reconciliation are truly inseparable. I learned that through humility I can see others as God sees them, not through the influence of my own misguided perceptions, and to stop listening to the negative thoughts that my flesh or the Enemy used to persuade me to be bitter and unwilling to forgive and reconcile.
Keeping in mind what has helped me to be open to God’s work in me regarding my own need for ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ is what His Word says about both, how he has dealt with my sin, and what He expects of me regarding my relationship with others. As these both ultimately resolve down to my spiritual growth and maturity, I approach this subject with this assurance, that only through Christ am I able to set aside uncertainty regarding where I stand with God and others. We must be willing to submit our will to God’s will. I cannot affect change in myself apart from His work in me, and only God can affect change in others, but He can use me as His ambassador to present His truth to lead others to know His will through His Word.
One of the most profound aspect of God’s work in us is to keep the end in mind. To be eternally minded, to obtain and live moment by moment within the framework of that knowledge, not simply as it relates to how others have impacted us, but how God may work through us to impact others for His purpose and glory. This represents our legacy, our reward, and the product of His workmanship; those things which will withstand the refiners fire to purify us and will remain of us in eternity. Keeping our focus on doing His will defeats the will of our flesh, our old nature, and this provides a discernment which is an anchor to eternity, not the past or the present, to keep us oriented heavenward, Galatians 2:20 (NKJV): “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.”
Through the Apostle John, God cautions us in Revelation 3:18 (NKJV): “I counsel you to buy from Me gold refined in the fire, that you may be rich; and white garments, that you may be clothed, that the shame of your nakedness may not be revealed; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see.”
John is referring to obtaining treasures in heaven through the work of the Holy Spirit in and through us, purity through our love relationship with Jesus to judge by spiritual values not human standards, and eye salve as a cure for our spiritual blindness which we can receive from His Word, which is applied through the work of His Holy Spirit who dwells in us.
It is just as important to be discerning about our approach to rightly dividing the Word of God as it is to whom we go to for advice about dealing with conflicts in our relationships. As Paul and Silas were sent to Berea in Acts 17:10-12, “the Berean Jews received the Word with readiness, and searched the Scriptures daily to find out whether these things were so. Therefore many of them believed as did not just a few of the Greeks, prominent women as well as men.” The main point of this passage relates the importance of our attentiveness to search out the truth of God’s Word to be certain we are not deceived. I have read articles, even by well-meaning pastors, that provided advice that is frankly not biblical. To divide the Word of God carelessly is a terrible injustice to the reader and accomplishes the work of Satan to confuse people who need to see things clearly from God’s perspective. In one particular article the author contended that it is perfectly acceptable to God that we forgive others for hurting us, but that we have no responsibility to reconcile with them.
In this article on the subject of forgiveness, the author quoted scripture to support the idea that Jesus commands us to forgive others. However, in a subsequent article, he offered absolutely no scriptural foundation to support the idea that God permits withholding reconciliation. In essence the writer revealed that he is either ignorant or deceived, and is thus deceiving the reader by combining a true premise with a false conclusion. In the first instance he offers biblical truth to affirm God’s requirement to forgive, but in the second he only offers his own truth from his own perspective. There is only one truth, God’s truth!
Although the reader was first offered a valid argument — the biblical reference to support the idea that God expects us to forgive — but then the reader was offered a false conclusion, his conclusion. The author didn’t site scripture to back up his position, leaving the reader to think it’s okay to abide by a standard which differs from Gods standard as it relates to our accountability to reconcile. That’s the worse kind of violation for a theological argument, it’s a doctrine of demons. The result is that he is excusing himself and the reader from accountability to God, by supporting motives that represent walking in the flesh, while denying God’s directive to all believers to walk according to the Spirit Galatians 5:16 (NKJV): “I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.”
Taking into account, if the writer were referring to a person who has demonstrated no desire to repent or reconcile (Matthew 18:15-17), it would be understandable that he would be powerless to fully comply with the biblical model that conjoins ‘forgiveness and reconciliation,’ But that the other person was unwilling to repent was not the premise of his argument, or the explanation of his theology. Nor did he offer a doctrinal position which supports that conclusion. Ephesians 4:31–32 (NKJV): “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” This scripture offers a biblical example of our Lord’s perspective, which is very straight forward as Christ offers us forgiveness for the purpose of reconciliation.
In fact, it is quite difficult to understand how a person who writes under the title of pastor could make such errors. When examined in light of scripture, it brings their motives into question. If our motives are centered on pleasing God rather than ourself, our motives and actions will result in honoring God, not pleasing our self. The entire premise of the article completely ignored the picture of God’s sovereignty and the fact that we cannot separate ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ because they are conjoined in God’s plan of salvation. It is not possible to receive forgiveness from God without also being reconciled to Him, just as it is not possible to receive God’s forgiveness unless we have forgiven others (Matthew 6:14). So why would we think even for a moment, that it would be acceptable to God for us to separate ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ as it relates to our relationship with one another as believers?
One Truth, God’s Truth - Scripture is the Path to Perfection
Scripture rightly teaches us that the source of Truth is Jesus. Jesus said in
John 10:27 (NKJV): “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.” His voice is identified through scripture and His example of ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ is based on God’s perspective, not man’s. It is only possible for us to accomplish God’s will to forgive and reconcile as truth and faith come together in the most beautiful way. The result is even more beautiful, and that is a changed heart. That’s what repentance is, a change of heart. The person who has offended another has a change of heart and acknowledges their offense, and the person who has been offended has a change of heart to forgive and restore the offender to a right relationship of fellowship. That’s what Jesus made possible through His blood sacrifice, so that each of us can be reconciled together to God. The Psalmist David writes in, Psalm 16:8 (NASB) “I have set the Lord continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.”
If we are only concerned with our part to forgive, then we do not do the will of our Heavenly Father. We do not forgive simply as a course of checking off a “to-do-list”, but we search our heart to know that we are walking in the Spirit of truth. Our part in repentance is acknowledging the condition of our heart toward God and others, and to allow His Word to bring our thoughts and our will into submission to His will. Our part in restoration is acknowledging how God has dealt with us through His unconditional love, and therefore to be reconciled with one another. Scripture is the source of the knowledge of God and all wisdom.
The Psalmist expresses God’s view of us and our sinfulness, and His mercy and grace, to withhold His wrath from us in Psalm 103:10–14
“He has not dealt with us according to our sins, Nor punished us according to our iniquities. 11 For as the heavens are high above the earth, So great is His mercy toward those who fear Him; 12 As far as the east is from the west,
So far has He removed our transgressions from us. 13 As a father pities his children, So the Lord pities those who fear Him. 14 For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.”
Although we each have offended God and broken His commandments, God has such love for us as to not only forgive our sins, but also to remove them, as far as the east is from the west, as though they never happened. He doesn’t stop at merely offering us forgiveness, He forgives so that we can be reconciled with Him and to enter into fellowship with Him. Knowing He works in us through His Spirit to form us into the image of His Son Jesus, compels us to conform to His model in how we deal with one another. It is the purpose of the gospel to reconcile us to God through Christ, to be in unity with His Spirit and live together in harmony. The theme we see repeated throughout the gospels, and indeed all of scripture is simply this, there is God’s part and our part when it comes to ‘forgiveness and reconciliation.’
The mystery of the gospel is revealed fully in the person of Christ Jesus. In this prayer, Paul describes what is our appreciation of that mystery in:
Ephesians 3:14–21
“For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, 15 from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, 16 that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, 17 that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height—19 to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
20 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, 21 to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
God’s part In verse 14, Paul expresses reverence and submission through his posture of prayer. Verse 15 reveals a unique characteristic of God’s authority, Ephesians 3:15 (FSB): In the ancient Near East, naming something amounted to bringing it into existence, giving it identity, and exercising authority over it. Since all creation derives its name from the Father, He is both its source and its ruler. Verse 16 reveals that our inner man is empowered by God’s indwelling presence in our life. Verse 17, the presence of Christ works in the life of every believer to empower us as holy vessels, as His temple. Verse 18, evokes the boundless nature of Christ’s love. Verse 19, the love of Christ is beyond human comprehension. Verses 20-21, The Wiersbe Bible Commentary states: “the incomprehensible love of Christ is so profound, so vast, and so unifying, that He is able even to unify Jews and Gentiles together.” It is His glory that is fulfilled in the church, and we are that church.”
In God’s part, He has provided us with the template of how we are to live through Jesus’ example. Jesus walked in perfect unity with the Father. Paul’s prayer concluded chapter 3, and prepares us for his admonition for us to walk in unity in chapter 4.
Ephesians 4:1–6 Walk in Unity
4 “I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, 2 with all lowliness and gentleness, with long-suffering, bearing with one another in love, 3 endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6 one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all.”
Our Part
Paul’s teaching calls upon believers to walk worthy, to conduct ourselves according to God’s will, His purpose, to accomplish His plans in unity with one another. That would not be possible if we allow the Enemy or our flesh to convince us that this can be accomplished without being reconciled with one another. Just as God has reconciled us to Himself through Christ, we are also to be reconciled together through the love of Christ.
Paul describes scripture as being sharper than a two edged sword in Hebrews 4:12–13 “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are exposed and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.”
God has opened His Word to us through His Holy Spirit, so that we understand His Word, and it informs us that we are known by God. Everything we have said and done is known to God, even the intentions of our heart. Yet He desires for us to be reconciled to Him. Why? Because His love for us is perfect and unconditional, and when His love enters into us, we begin the process of being perfected, a process that continues throughout our lives. The goal being that we become Christlike in our hearts and minds, so that through His perfect love we choose to please God rather than ourselves. Unconditional means that although He desires for us to love Him, He does not withhold His love from us if we reject Him. That’s what perfect love is and the result of it in us works toward our perfection in Christ. It invites us at all times to come to Him and be reconciled, and has the same effect in our relationships with one another.
Paul offers this context to understand how we should interpret our own attitudes and actions, which should be based upon understanding the Word of God and the work of the Holy Spirit:
Galatians 5:16–21 “I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. 17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish [you know you should]. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, 21 envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
Paul began with what we know, how we were before our life was changed by spiritual birth in Christ. Our attitudes were centered on pleasing ourself while we were dead in our sins and spiritually blind. Paul warns that practicing, in other words continuing in those attitudes and actions without repentance, excludes a person from God’s kingdom. The commentary from FaithLife Study Bible offers this insight into Galatians 5:18 (FSB): “The law can define and identify sin, but it cannot provide the power to resist sin. Nor does the law instill within people the concerns, desires, and character of God. However, believers are not left on their own. They have been given the Spirit of the living God to empower them against sin and to transform their hearts and minds.”
An example of a person who believes they have been made right with God apart from ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ through Christ would be the Pharisees and religious leaders of Jesus day, who believed their status as descendants of Abraham or keepers of the law could satisfy God in place of faith in Christ’s sacrificial death, burial, and resurrection to provide salvation and reconciliation. Jesus clarified once and for all that salvation and reconciliation are accomplished through Him alone (See John 3:14–21). Those religious leaders didn’t understand God’s plan then, but we certainly do today. Saying we can offer forgiveness to someone without reconciliation is no less absurd than claiming to be a descendant of Abraham as a means to be right with God. Neither identifies us as partakers in the love of God in Christ.
Based on Paul’s teaching we identified the attitudes and actions of the flesh, which contend against the Spirit. In the verses that follow, Paul describes the attitudes and actions of the Spirit which, to us who belong to Christ and walk in the Spirit, contrast those of the flesh:
Galatians 5:22–25 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. 24 And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.”
Paul concludes with what we now know as disciples of Christ and children of God, and as image bearers of Christ. There is no law against the fruit of the Spirit because these are not a product of sin or our sin nature. As was mentioned previously, the law identifies those things which are sin, the fruit of the Spirit is a product of the Spirit of God which is love, against which there is no law.
The biblical model of “our part” our interaction with someone who has repented and asked for our forgiveness is much different than the conclusions in the article I referred to previously, as Paul continues to explicate in chapter 6.
Galatians 6:1–10 (NKJV): “Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. 2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. 3 For if anyone thinks himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. 4 But let each one examine his own work, and then he will have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. 5 For each one shall bear his own load.”
Be Generous and Do Good
6 “Let him who is taught the word share in all good things with him who teaches.
7 Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. 8 For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. 9 And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith.”
Wiersbe’s Commentary offers an insight on Galatians 6:1, “The spiritual man would seek to restore the brother in love, while the legalist would exploit the brother. The word restore means “to mend as a net, or to restore as a broken bone.” If you have ever had a broken bone, you know how painful it is to have it set. The sinning believer is like a broken bone in the body and needs to be restored. The believer who is led by the spirit and living in the liberty of grace will seek to help the erring brother, for “the fruit of the spirit is love” (Gal. 5:22).
A contrast in attitude. The Spirit-led believer approaches the matter in a spirit of meekness and love, while the legalist has an attitude of pride and condemnation. The legalist does not need to “consider himself” because he pretends he could never commit such a sin. But the believer living by grace realizes that no man is immune from falling. “Let him that thinks he stands take heed lest he fall” (1 Corinthians 10:12). He has an attitude of humility because he realizes his own weaknesses.”
It should be noted, that the Enemy of God, Satan, also seeks to exploit us in situations where we are tempted to believe anything that contradicts the truth of God’s Word. We can always find someone that is willing to tickle our ears, to tell us what we want to hear. Paul explains the ministry of reconciliation, by which we as children of God are each empowered to achieve God’s will.
2 Corinthians 5:17–19 “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 18 Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, 19 that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word [Ministry] of reconciliation.”
Paul commends us to know that we are dead to our old sin nature, all things have become new. As we are now in Christ, we begin a new life and a new quality of life. 2 Corinthians 5:17 (JFB Commentary): “New” in the Greek implies a new nature quite different from anything previously existing.”
Chapter 2
Love One Another As I Love You
At the conclusion of The Last Supper, Judas has departed, he is on his way to betray Christ, then Jesus says in John 13:31–35 “Therefore, when he [Judas] was gone out, Jesus said, “Now is the Son of man glorified, and God is glorified in him. 32 If God be glorified in him, God shall also glorify him in himself, and shall straightway glorify him. 33 Little children, yet a little while I am with you. Ye shall seek me: and as I said unto the Jews, Whither I go, ye cannot come; so now I say to you. 34 “A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”
The biblical references that support Jesus New Commandment are:
Leviticus 19:18 “You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”
Ephesians 5:2 “And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma.”
1 Thessalonians 4:9 “But concerning brotherly love you have no need that I should write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another.”
James 2:8–9 “If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” you do well; 9 but if you show partiality, you commit sin, and are convicted by the law as transgressors.”
1 Peter 1:22 “Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit in sincere love of the brethren, love one another fervently with a pure heart.”
Romans 12:18 “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”
Matthew 5:23–24 “Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
1 Peter 1:22 offers us significant insight about Christian togetherness. Wiersbe’s commentary states:
“We express the same love (v. 22). Peter used two different words for love: philadelphia, which is "brotherly love, and agape, which is godlike sacrificial love. It is important that we share both kinds of love. We share brotherly love because we are brothers and sisters in Christ and have likenesses. We share agape love because we belong to God and therefore can overlook differences.
By nature, all of us are selfish, so it took a miracle of God to give us this love. Because we "obey[ed] the truth through the Spirit,' God purified our souls and
poured His love into our hearts (Rom. 5:5). Love for the brethren is an evidence that we truly have been born of God (1 John 4:7-21). Now we are "obedient children" (1 Peter 1:14) who no longer want to live in the selfish desires of the old life.
It is tragic when people try to "manufacture" love, because the product is obviously cheap and artificial. "The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart: his words were softer than oil, yet were they drawn swords" (Ps. 55:21). The love that we share with each other, and with a lost world, must be generated by the Spirit of God. It is a constant power in our lives, and not something that we turn on and off like a radio.
Not only is this love a spiritual love, but it is a sincere love ("unfeigned"). We love "with a pure heart." Our motive is not to get but to give. There is a kind of "success psychology" popular today that enables a person to subtly manipulate others in order to get what he wants. If our love is sincere and from a pure heart,
we could never "use people" for our own advantage.
This love is also a fervent love, and this is an athletic term that means "striving with all of one's energy, Love is something we have to work at, just as an Olympic contestant has to work at his particular skills. Christian love is not a feeling; it is a matter of the will. Christian love means treating others the way God has treated us.”
The Narrow and the Wide Gates - Unity Through Truth
Matthew 7:13–14 (NKJV): “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. 14 Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.” Enter by the Narrow gate— Matthew 7:13 (JFB): as if hardly wide enough to admit one at all. This expresses the difficulty of the first right step in religion, involving, as it does, a triumph over all our natural inclinations. Hence the still stronger expression in Luke (Luke 13:24), “Strive to enter in at the strait gate.”
The Course Correcting Quality of Scripture
2 Timothy 3:16–17 (NKJV): “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
To paraphrase the Daily Devotional, “Experiencing God Day-By-Day” by Henry and Richard Blackaby, “The world is full of experts, guru’s, and philosopher’s who want to convince us of the wisdom of their opinion. The Bible teaches that it isn’t the one who declares their opinion the loudest or most widely accepted, but the one who is vindicated over time.” Luke 7:35 (NKJV): Jesus said, “But wisdom is justified by all her children.”
When we witness a fellow christian err in judgement by following worldly advice or in incorrectly applying the truth of God’s Word, we are obliged to lovingly provide correction. To discern whether they are misled and are being led toward the wide gate, and then redirect through scripture toward the narrow gate. Scripture alone can provide the means to correct our motives and align them with God’s Truth and His will. The passages in this section deal with the biblical context of the indivisible unity between ‘forgiveness and reconciliation.’
To recap, the main problem with the article I referred to lies in the shift in direction the author takes the reader, the pretext that ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ can be separated. The hair-splitting of legalism is apparent as the author first introduces the means to achieve the required obedience to the letter of the law, to forgive. Then he introduces the change in direction from the motive of forgiveness, which is our love for God and for one another, to the motive of serving (The flesh) his own interests, which represents the escape hatch to then fulfill the desires of the flesh. This moves the reader to find the exit from the relationship between ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ and thereby violates the heart of the law to love one another as Christ loves us, unconditionally.
According to Wiersbe’s Commentary: “Christian love means treating others the way God has treated us.” In the context of Christ’s commandment to love as He loves, how can we love someone if we have permitted ourselves to end the relationship because we neglect the weightier matter of demonstrating the heart of Christ through ‘mercy and justice,’ by falsely separating ‘forgiveness and reconciliation?’ This results in superficial forgiveness by withholding reconciliation, and results in injustice by leaving the other person in a state of humiliation. That does not convey the love of Christ on any level. We are to restore one another, which is to reconcile, as we saw in Galatians 6:1.
Micah 6:8 “He has shown you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you But to do justly, To love mercy, And to walk humbly with your God?”
The next biblical example of our responsibility to reconcile is found as Jesus teaches in: Matthew 7:12 “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”
This scripture reveals Jesus' perspective on personal interaction and relationships, and offers godly principles to “do unto others as we would have them to unto us.” Also known as the “Golden Rule.”
Scripture further expounds on Matthew 7:12 in these three references:
Romans 13:8 “Owe no one anything except to love one another, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law.”
Galatians 5:13–14 “For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 14 For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
1 Timothy 1:5–7 “Now the purpose of the commandment is love from a pure heart, from a good conscience, and from sincere faith, 6 from which some, having strayed, have turned aside to idle talk, 7 desiring to be teachers of the law, understanding neither what they say nor the things which they affirm.”
The same article I referred to partially depicted the conflicts we face and the need to be spiritually discerning, and of course the conflict of spiritual warfare is very real. Navigating through this life and doing so in the example of Christ is not easy. Paul provides us with the only option we have as it relates to dealing with the conflicts and challenges to walking in the spirit. In choosing between walking in the flesh or walking in the spirit, Paul says that we must die to self in order to live unto Christ. This is referred to in theological terms as a paradox principle.
Galatians 2:20–21 (NKJV): “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. 21 I do not set aside the grace of God; for if righteousness comes through the law, then Christ died in vain.”
2 Corinthians 10:3–6 “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, 5 casting down arguments (imaginings) and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, 6 and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.”
Wiersbe’s Commentary on 2 Corinthians 10:3-6 “Paul’s affirmation that we walk in the flesh illustrates that we walk in weakness, but not according to the flesh (vv. 2). Our carnal weapons in the flesh are weak, unable to attain to spiritual defenses or to counter attack (vv. 4). Pulling down strongholds, inspired by God like the prophets of old, through the Word of God which is His might, we are able to move others into His light to cast down the lies of the Enemy, to vanquish with His Truth (vv. 4). 2 Corinthians 10:4 (JFB): Strongholds— namely in which sinners entrench themselves against reproof; all that opposes itself to Christ; the learning, and eloquence, and philosophical subtleties on which the Corinthians prided themselves. So Joshua’s trumpet blast was “mighty” under God to overthrow the walls of Jericho.” 2 Corinthians 10:5 (JFB): Imaginings—rather, “reasonings.” Whereas “thought” expresses men’s own purpose and determination of living after their own pleasure. High thing—2 Corinthians 10:5 (JFB): Not so much as “height” as something made high, and belongs to those regions of air where the powers of darkness “exalt themselves” against Christ and us (Eph 2:2; 6:12; 2 Thes. 2:4). 2 Corinthians 10:5 (JFB): exalts itself— Such were the high towers of Judaic self-righteousness, philosophic speculations, and rhetorical sophistries, the “knowledge” so much prized by many (opposed to “the knowledge of God”), which endangered a section of the Corinthian Church. 2 Corinthians 10:5 (JFB): against the knowledge of God—True knowledge makes men humble. Where there is exaltation of self, there knowledge of God is wanting. Arrange the words following thus: “Bringing every thought (that is, intent of the mind or will) into captivity to the obedience of Christ,” that is, to obey Christ. The three steps of the apostle’s spiritual warfare are: (1) It demolishes what is opposed to Christ; (2) It leads captive; (3) It brings into obedience to Christ (Rom 1:5; 16:26). The “reasonings” (English Version, “imaginations”) are utterly “cast down.” The “mental intents” (English Version, “thoughts”) are taken willing captives, and tender the voluntary obedience of faith to Christ the Conqueror.
JFB is the Jamieson-Fausset-Brown Bible Commentary, aka the Commentary Critical and Explanatory on the Whole Bible.
Paul also commends us in this way: Ephesians 4:30–5:1 (NKJV): “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32 And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
And furthermore Paul illustrates how our character should reflect godliness as new a creation in Christ:
Colossians 3:12–14 (NKJV): “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. 14 But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection.”
(Wiersbe’s Commentary states: (Col. 3:12-14) “Chosen by God, set apart for God, loved by God, and forgiven by God. They all add up to GRACE.”
As Paul stated, “Even as Christ forgave you” we must put on the same beautiful graces of the Christian life. Has Christ forgiven you and then left you to your own vices? Has He justified you, but has neglected to chastise you? Has He restored you to fellowship, only to abandon all forms of spiritual intimacy with you?
A Kingdom Divided
When confronted by the religious rulers of His day, Jesus clearly defended against the false accusations, that He is of the devil.
Mark 3:22–26 “And the scribes who came down from Jerusalem said, “He has Beelzebub,” and, “By the ruler of the demons He casts out demons.”
23 So He called them to Himself and said to them in parables: “How can Satan cast out Satan? 24 If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. 25 And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand. 26 And if Satan has risen up against himself, and is divided, he cannot stand, but has an end.”
FaithLife commentary states:
In Mark 3:24 (FSB): “Jesus confronts the religious leaders with the possibility that, by opposing Him, they might be aligning themselves with evil powers. The defining mark of a disciple of God’s kingdom is allegiance to Jesus and His teaching.”
An important take away from that scripture is that Satan also understands the principle of a house divided cannot stand. The devil always seeks to divide us and destroy God’s work in us and through us. As scripture teaches us from the very beginning, the devil was an influencer for evil purposes. He was the cause of sin entering the world, bringing its curse upon all of humanity. That’s why as disciples of Jesus we must be spiritually discerning and scripturally sound in our approach to life. Jesus warns us in Matthew 24:24 “For there shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall show great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect.”
Feeling Empowered or Feeling Humbled
Our flesh, and by extension our culture, promotes the idea that we are empowered to take control of our lives. Our culture teaches that independence from authority is both freedom and power, but scripture teaches that we are empowered by surrendering to Christ. Jesus’ teachings bid us to yield control of our life to Him, to walk in the Spirit. That is accomplished through the instructions of His Word and applying it through the power of His indwelling Holy Spirit. Surrendering our will to His is the example of love that Christ Jesus has given us. It is not an example of doing our own will, but doing the will of our Heavenly Father, as Jesus’ life illustrates the cost of discipleship. The following verses underscore these biblical principles:
Luke 9:23 “Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.” [This is another example of the paradox principle Paul described earlier, to die to self].
Matthew 7:21 “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven.” [Saying that Jesus is Lord is meaningless if it is not affirmed by obedience to do God’s will].
James 4:4–6 “Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. 5 Or do you think that the Scripture says in vain, “The Spirit who dwells in us yearns jealously”? 6 But He gives more grace. Therefore He says:
“God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”
To paraphrase Wiersbe’s Commentary, James is emphasizing that our humility invites God’s grace, that He jealously longs for our loyalty and devotion to Him. Our humility not only invites His grace toward us, but also toward those with whom we interact in accordance with His will.
James 4:7–12 Humility Cures Worldliness “Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.”
James is admonishing believers to be devoted to learning of God so we can be spiritually discerning, to know the difference between the voice of the Spirit and the voice of the Enemy and our flesh, because His Spirit will empower us to resist the work of the Enemy and our old sin nature through the knowledge of God. Confessing our sin cleanses us of unrighteousness so that we are able to distinguish between these voices and obey the voice of the Lord. We are not able to hear His voice clearly when we disobey, because sin interferes in our relationship with God. Yet we fulfill this requirement when we humble ourselves and repent, we are again reconciled to God.
James’ counsel to submit to God requires that we recognize His sovereignty over our lives, because Jesus does not call us merely to confess our sins, but also to be reconciled to Him as Lord. Just as accepting Christ as ‘Lord and Savior’ are inseparable to our right relationship with God, so also ‘forgiveness and reconciliation’ are essential in our relationship with God and one another, because the context of our relationship together is defined by our right relationship with God. James continues to teach about humility toward one another in James 4:11-12.
Do Not Judge a Brother
11 “Do not speak evil of one another, brethren. He who speaks evil of a brother and judges his brother, speaks evil of the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. 12 There is one Lawgiver, who is able to save and to destroy. Who are you to judge another?”
James further implores believers to recognize the double mindedness of judging other believers, and that doing so places us in God’s position as judge. By extension, if we are to reconcile with God through confessing our sin and in obedience to repent, then to reconcile with other believers is also obedience because it fulfills the command to abide in the love of Christ.
John 15:9–11 “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 11 “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full.”
Romans 12:2 “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
FSB Commentary states: “The renewing of our mind refers to mental conformity to the truth of God. This renewal results in a transformation in the life of the believer. Conforming to the perfect will of God describes the purpose of our renewal and transformation.”
Peter’s betrayal
In John 18:15-27 scripture tells us of Peter’s denial of Christ. This represents one of the most poignant examples of reconciliation in scripture. Even though our Lord pointedly warned Peter, that despite his fervency to prevent Jesus’ arrest in the Garden of Gethsemane, that Peter would deny Him three times before the cock crowed. In verse 15-17, After His arrest, Peter drew near, trying to hear what the Jews were going to do with Jesus. Peter stood outside but was invited into the courtyard by the young woman who was also the door keeper. She was the first to ask Peter if he was not also one of Jesus disciples. He replied, “I am not!”
In verses 18-25 Peter now was near the coal fire that the servants and officers had made because it was cold outside. The former High Priest began questioning Jesus about His disciples and doctrine. As Jesus responded to the questions asked of Him, Peter stood and warmed himself by the fire. One of them asked him, “You are not one of His disciples also, are you?” “I am not!” Peter said. One of the servants of the high priest, a relative of him whose ear Peter cut off, said, “Did I not see you in the garden with Him?” Peter then denied again; and immediately a rooster crowed. It’s obvious Peter denied Christ because he feared for his own life too. Knowing how much he loved Jesus, as he denied knowing Him the third time and hearing the cock crow, it must have crushed Peter’s heart.
That betrayal was not the end of Jesus’ love for Peter, nor was it the end of their relationship. We know from scripture that after Jesus’ resurrection He forgave and reconciled with Peter. That story can be found here in:
John 21:15–19 “So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you *love Me more than these?” —*Greek, Agapaō, meaning to love unconditionally.
He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I *love You.” —Greek *Phileō, to love as a friend.
He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”
16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you *love Me?” —*Jesus again uses the word agapaō, unconditional love.
Peter replied to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I *love You.” —*Phileō, love as a friend.
He said to him, “Tend My sheep.”
17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?” —Phileō, love as a friend.
Jesus came down to Peter’s level this time. (Grieved, Peter seems to understand that Jesus’ three questions parallel his three denials. He is grieved by being forced to remember his failing in front of the one whom he had denied).
And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.”
Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. (Verse 17. “Feed,” Jesus instructs Peter to guide His people)
18 ”Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.”
19 This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.”
It does not take a very long time for Jesus to forgive Peter and restore him. Peter’s confession of his love for Jesus using the Greek word Phileō, meaning love of a friend, was an expression of humility as he was profoundly sorrowful about denying Christ. Peter was to lead the church and to do so as an anointed leader meant that Peter must understand the bond of love Christ has for him and the church, and that we each must have for one another.
Wiersbe’s Commentary says: “The key issue is Peter’s love for the Lord Jesus and that should be a key matter for us today.” Reconciliation is a natural response to us when we walk closely with Christ, just as lovingly inviting our brother or sister back into His light, by offering a candle to light their way.
Matthew Henry’s Commentary offers this insight: “Jesus waited until after they had dined together, in token of reconciliation, then approached him about it, not as with a criminal, but as with a friend. Peter had reproached himself for it, and therefore Christ did not reproach him for it, nor tell him of it directly, but only by a tacit intimation; and, being satisfied in his sincerity, the offense was not only forgiven, but forgotten; and Christ let him know that he was as dear to him as ever. Herein he has given us an encouraging instance of his tenderness towards penitents, and has taught us, in like manner, to restore such as are fallen with a spirit of meekness.”
Rabbi Akiva was one of the most revered teachers of Israel. He is quoted as saying, “If I speak to your heart, your mind will follow. But if I speak only to your mind, your heart will never arrive. Only the Word of God can speak to us in ways that transform our thinking and understanding. And only the Word of God has the power to reveal truth and God’s will. It is my hope and prayer that the truth I have shared in this article will speak to your heart.
Praying you have a wonderful Christmas filled with moments you’ll always remember.
